There are all kinds of ways to rate movies. Thumbs, tomatoes, stars.
And there are all different things to rate about movies.
So inspired by Jake's latest picture of Southpaw, where nary a hair can be found on his frame, we rate Jake's movie with the 'Scape Rate -i.e. how much manscaping it took to get the look.
City Slickers
It's a kid. Give him a haircut and he's good to go. 0 pots of wax
October Sky
Barely old enough to shave, there wasn't much hair on the chest way back when. 0 pots of wax
Donnie Darko
Clean up the brows a bit, a shave and throw in a haircut -good to go. 1/4 pot of wax
Bubble Boy
With an arch that rivals Joan Crawford there was some step up to waxing, but left those limbs au natural. 1 pot of wax.
Lovely & Amazing
It was more hair dye than wax, but Jake was still keeping up with the defined brow. 1 pot of wax.
The Good Girl
Keep those brows thinned, and a little clean up on the knuckles during those manis. - 1 pot of Wax
Highway
Some hair wax to make his hair stand up, it was pretty much the color and that spider face paint that was the center of this look. 2 pots of wax.
Moonlight Mile
A little cut and color. Clean up a bit for the show scene in the beginning. 1 pot of wax.
The Day After Tomorrow
On screen he is gets to show that perfect amount of scruff. Off screen there was some serious manscaping for sure (with assistance - no doubt ; ) ) 3 pots of wax in a homage to those 3 chicken that got them heated up.
Proof
Keeping up with GOOP --- 3 pots of wax for that alone
Jarhead
Shaved, high and tight, - wait are we talking about hair or Jake's tiny heiney? It was a Marine effort to get the balance of looking smooth and slight rough around those (great) edges. 3 pots of wax.
Brokeback Mountian
It wasn't about taking off hair, but the tricky use of hair to age him over 25 plus years with a little work for those tent scenes. 2 pots of wax
Zodiac
Fincher kept him in the era and did 70's natural and sideburn'd. 2 pots of wax - because it's Fincher.
Rendition
Sculptured that chest hair for a memorable opening scene and with the Zevon of molded hair - 3 pots of wax
Brothers
The first time for a beard, and a tattoo. 2 pots of wax for the learning curve of the first time.
Nailed
You thought it was about the doofy congressional hair, but then you saw this and you knew they found the money for some wax. 3 pots of wax.
Prince of Persia
The Rachel hair, the Disney prince precise level of hairy chest, you know there were many many meetings across the House of the Mouse. 3 pots of wax for the teleconferencing alone.
Love and Other Drugs
Whatever it took it was worth it. 4 pots of wax
Source Code
Make him look like a history teacher - the well groomed Supercuts look gets 2 pots of wax.
End of Watch
Not only did he lose the beard, but lost all of that thick hair. That's a shave and a half - every single day. 3 pots of wax
Prisoners
The tricky 90's pop haircut and tattoos gave prison to 2 pots of wax.
Enemy
Double the role - half of the maintenance. It was a low maintenance with keep the beard and work the hair, and let the fur go free. 1 pot of wax.
Nightcrawler
Skinny, smooth and the man bun. 2 pots of wax.
Everest
He let it go and let it grow - but there was some trimming and smoothing when he lost the coat... sweater... shirt... pants... 1 pot of wax.
Southpaw
No hair anywhere. They just dipped him in and ripped it off. He had to be yelling "Kelly Clarkson" by the time they were waxing the abs. 5+ pots of wax.
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