Lost in Twit-lation

People tweeted out a picture of Jake with this tweet:

 People magazine (@peoplemag)
12/29/14, 05:30

Hello Jake Gyllenhaal and Jake Gyllenhaal's facial hair http://peoplem.ag/r6mCg5q

Then mysteriously the caption was this when you went to the People site:

OFF BROADWAY

Away from the Broadway stage, Jake Gyllenhaal keeps close to Constellations costar Ruth Wilson on a Saturday walk through N.Y.C.


So did the tweeter from People get a whisker too close to the truth in it's awkwardness?

Dating him

Here's a twist on dating Jake.

New photos from Variety show Jake like this:

In pictures from Sunday night's screening Jake looked like this.

It is obvious that those Variety pictures were taken early,  with Jake looking a bit healthier, more robust and back to himself in the new pictures from the screening.

The green trousers can't work this time.



MediaCrawler Tour:

Oct 29 The Ellen Degeneres Show,  check local listings for time and channel

Oct 30: Conan  TBS,  11:00pm

Fun with Photos

One of the outtakes from promo pictures for an interview about LaOD

Top Ten Captions for this Picture

10. Jake: Am I supposed to hear the ocean or your heartbeat?

9.  Anne: No Jake,  girls do not have cooties.

8.  Anne:  Don't cry Jakey, you'll get an Oscar one day.

7.  Jake: I'll need to call my therapist,  this is oddly maternal and terrifying.

6. Anne:  I want to be Jack and you be Ennis. 

4. Jake:  Ok, you can stop holding me now,  I think they got enough pictures.

3. Anne:  Ohhh sweetie I'm sorry... you can't borrow my Les Mis outfit.

2.  Anne:  Let me tell you a story, about a big bad wolf ...okay ...wolverine name Hugh.

5.  Anne:  Okay, I'm Fantine,  and you're young Corsette.


And the #1 caption

I know it's confusing with me being a girl.

Not pulling any punches

To: Southpaw production

From: Management

Re: Boxing Idioms to avoid

It has come to our attention that several boxing idioms could used in  certain "discussions" about our client.  Please avoid as much as possible.

Throw in the towel

Take the belt

Give him "the old one-two"

Out for the count

Below the belt

Blow-by-blow

Take it on the chin

A low blow

Come out swinging

And saved by the bell.  (Not for the obvious reasons, but just because we don't want a Screech connection)

Hollywood Horror!

Just out for a evening drive

You think you see something out of the corner of you eye

 

Not sure if it is anything.

Suddenly the phone rings

 

 Hello Jake....

You can't see me ....

but I can see you ...

Remember the story of the bloody hook?  

Have you heard about the arm from the backseat?

 Shhhh.....It's behind you.

Lucky Duck or Cover?

First the eagle eyes of OMG tracked this down:

A guy that looked like jake gyllenhaal ate at bluewater today and I came home and jake was on the TV 😍😍😍 - Twitter

Which had Jake spotted in NC the afternoon before his sitdown with Jon on The Daily Show.

Then this picture popped up this morning of Jake getting lunch at the Lucky Duck on Monday

Which prompted OMGers to call foul and speculate that Jake didn't duck but Goosed on Monday (and the weekend) before this week's press started.

But when the Goose flew the coop and landed in Austin and tweeted about it twice

 Excited to watch my bros Maroon 5 rip it tonight in Austin, TX. - AUS10

 and  

My bros are shredding!! - AUS10

it looked as obvious as Tommy singing like a bird to Ray about his latest f-up.

But back to Jake's busy day

After charming Jon and getting on the best comebacks on the comic.

Jake said "Good Morning America" and sat down with  Lara Spencer for an interview for Prisoners.



Then it was off to Live with Kelly and Michael

where Jake was asked if he was "In or Out" (Where's Kevin Klein and Tom Selleck ? And what do those producers over at Kelly & Michael know?)



and gave a glimpse what the Hangover might have looked like with a twitpic with Mike Tyson

then Jake was over to Sirius radio to sit down and chat (and run into actress Amber Tamblyn who was Sirius promoting her project too)

And then last night another article in USA Today with Jake and Hugh talking about Prisoners appeared online.  A few things to point out from the article.

1) It was a great picture of Jake

2) Now we know why Jake is looking so thin at the moment

3) Jake's producing another movie

"And Gyllenhaal is on a severely restricted diet as he preps for the crime drama Nightcrawler, which he's also producing —Gyllenhaal is only half-joking when he says he's having raw kale for dinner. "I ate a lemon slice like that because I was so hungry," he recalls, making a sour face. "And I said, 'I love it!'"

And where will Jake be on Thursday?

Well on screen he will be on :

Take No Prisoners Tour

Sept 19 - Jake will be taping the Katie Couric Show with the entire cast of Prisoners at 9:00 am- New York
The show airs 3:00 PM EDT check local listings.

Sept 19 - Inside the Actor's Studio - BRAVO 8:00pm EDT


But off screen?  Well he might have taken wings and flown.

My mother just sat next to jake gyllenhaal on the plane #crazy 
-Twitter

 @cj_rocks_10 right? He was actually sitting in her seat and she asked him to move lol

 @cj_rocks_10 lol maybe a tad! She said he was actually pretty strange..and he has two phones and cracks his knuckles a lot

Whew that's going to be a quick trip to make back by morning.  Red Bull might give most wings, but Jake might get his from the nest.

Pickin' a Pic

They say that a picture tells a story, but with pictures of Jake can make you ask questions.

Take this one from earlier this week.

This is a picture of Jake riding his bike earlier this week.

First up the weather

This has been the hottest week of year on the Eastern seaboard, and New York is part of that heat wave.   It was 93F for high that day in NYC but with the humidity the heat index felt like a 100+

Who would go for a bike ride in that heat? And why is he not sweating?

Then the time

This picture was taken between 11:30 -1:00 pm based on the shadow of the wheels of the bike and people on the sidewalk. Jake knows better than to go out and exercise midday in that kind of extreme heat and humidity.

But is the only person on the street Jake? It's noon. It's New York. The street looks wide enough for traffic in to go both directions but there is not one car. It's noon, on a weekday, in New York and not one car?!?

And New Yorkers are typically blase about celebrities, they're not gawkers.  So why is there a whole group of people stopped and looking toward the camera? New Yorkers don't stop and stare in groups, at noon, on a weekday, in New York.  They aren't looking at Jake, he has his head turned away from them.

And why is Jake looking straight into the camera rather than looking ahead to see what is ahead of him?  It's not like he's looking for traffic. Because there isn't any,  at noon, on a weekday, in New York.

And what's up with giant sun spots and streaks?

Things are lookin' a bit 'shoppy

Now what questions do you have?

The Dirty Dozen

Get out your red pens and scorecards because it's Red Arrow Time

And it's all about the alleged picture of Jake and Anna K.


Ready set go.....

1. Why is there a perfect subtle line down the middle of picture - to the left it is out of focus and fuzzy and to the right, clear and sharp?

 (working clockwise)

2. (Right lower corner) From the angle of the camera how can the person (who is left handed btw) drinking the beer be sitting so close to the photographer, who used his right hand to take the picture?

3.The table and the glasses.  It looks like a picnic table but actually it look more like  long tables at a beer garden.  Also look at the size of the glasses - they are larger than the ones that are used in the US.   Why does the the picture make you think Europe  more than NYC?

4. Hand with the glass (left side of picture).  Look at the picture.  Why does it look like that hand is resting on the girls shoulder. Who would put a glass that close to someone's face.  And for matter How freakin' tall must that person be if it is over 5'2" inches ( the height of the Anna K if that is who they are claiming it to be) and they're still not anywhere close their mouth.

5. Speaking of height - how can Anna at 5' 2" with her head bent down be the same height as Jake who is 6'.   And don't say they are sitting because look at the guy to Jake's right - he's standing and so are all the people standing behind them.

6. Why is the girls head too small for her body?  And if you say that's her pony tail, look again you don't see a neck and look at  the hand to the left there is a distinct line between the knuckles of the hand holding the glass and the side of her hair.

7. Speaking of hair - it can't be Anna.  Why?  Because Anna doesn't have red hair at the moment.  She's gone blonde for a role.  She put a picture up of her with blonde hair on her instagram April 11 that was Thurs.  How did she have red hair 2 days later  (Source)

8. Grey sweater/ Jake's Hat. The person in the grey sweater is out of proportion. The shoulder if too big and round for a person who has a torso that trim.  Or should that be "thinned" as in Photoshopped.  Also the tip of their chin is cut off.

9. And Jake's head is known to be big, really big, but it looks small in comparison to the upper arm of the person in the grey sweater.  Something stinks and it starts at the head in this arrow.

10.   Speaking of stinking from the head down.  Check out under Jake's chin.  If you are going to fill in the space underneath after you dropped him in the picture at least make the pixels the same color. It's a shade or two off, and it shows!

11.  Look how sharp the line between Jake's back and the person in the black shirt behind him is... it lends to the argument that Jake was dropped into the picture.

12.  Look at Jake's lower back. What is that supposed to be pushing up his shirt?  If it was a glass it is smaller than anything else in the whole picture and any of the other glasses.  If it was a can, it would be more likely tipped over than pushing up a shirt.

Think a dozen is enough?

Grimmenhaal

Speaking of Grimmy.  What would they say about him and Jake after these pictures.

(Clockwise)

"Who wants kale?  We do!"

Jake is that your best stink eye or is Grimmy just a stinky dancer?

What kind of goggles would these two be wearing? Gin? Beer? Glitter?

"Hey now, Tinselteeth is too close to Toothy Tile"

What a Difference a Day Makes Part 2

Today was Yom Kippur the most important day of the Jewish calendar.  It is a day of atonement after 10 days of reflecting on what you've done over the past year, it is a day usually spent with family, fasting, praying  and in services.

It reminded me of last year's Yom Kippur, you know when Jake was living in New York.

Hey he's living in New York this year too.

And how everyone was seen (or 'shopped)  going to services together last year.

Kind of like this year


 .. oh wait

Hmmm wonder what's the difference?

Picture Problem

There are four pictures of Jake leaving Parma restaurant late last night but they create more questions that answers like:

Why only 4 pictures? That's not even a second of photography - they shoot 10-12 frames a second.

Was there someone that they didn't want to have pictures of taken with Jake?

Who would eat alone so late at night?

It looks like he is coming from somewhere up the street and walking past the door. Why not use the door to the restaurant?  Why did he have to use another exit if he was all alone?

By the Hair on His Chinny Chin Chin

[Thanks to the sharp eye of M&M who noticed the hair raising this weekend. – Gold Stars for you]

Not only does Jake have to worry about continuity of outfits if he is going to outwit the public, and especially OMG, he really needs to keep track of the follicles on his face.

Let’s just call Saturday Beard Busted.

Why?

Well look at his beard while shooting last week in Toronto.

Now look at the picture they said was from Saturday in NYC.

Now look at the picture of Jake filming Sunday in Toronto.

Ahh big guy… you should know by now, that beards while magical to gnomes, sleepy old guys and goats, they can’t do what yours did this weekend.

And if you want further proof, we got ‘stache.

See how the corners of his moustache are trimmed to curve down on the sides?

Last week on set.

But on Saturday somehow he grew a thick full ‘stache straight across.

And then back again on Sunday.

How’d that happen? 

Magical Moustache indeed. (Are they like magic carpets? ; ) 

And why the picture switch-a-roo?  Maybe because he had some VIPs that needed his full attention during his the short trip to NYC.    Or a ride on the rails?

And don’t think running isn’t acting because how else could the Sultan of Soul Cycle be out of breath running down the street?