Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Hughenhaal

With Disney posting a loss of 97% of operating income last year and other studios in tough times, Hollywood is getting creative. In an effort of cost cutting in these times of tough economy, Hollywood has a devised a new marketing plan to get a two for the price of one. And not in the old school Hollywood way, one star dating another. (yawn)

Harnessing the powers of science and comics, Hollywood will merge two actor to form one entity. Starmergance has devised a way to locate similar stars and create a third Hollywood and PR entity with a mean age of 34. Their first project. Hugh Jackman and Jake Gyllenhaal. Both desirable actors to both men and women, A-listers, and smiley guys. Starmergance also looks at background, box office numbers, Q number, power rankings, and the chatter around Hollywood to find a suitable pair of candidates.

2 actors for the price of one.

You can see the Starmergance process.



The hairy man pecs



The formal awards look

Action hero - Pendants and Bi...ceped
Hair Gone Wild (not so good)


Hair Gone Wild (much improved)

Time with Gavin
Musical Men
Boy from Oz/ Boys of Summer (Damn Yankees)
The new face of Hollywood - Hughenhaal


This could mean layoffs for others.....Ms. Witherspoon was unavailable for comment.

42 comments:

Special K said...

Happy Birthday Kacie!

Meg said...

That is very clever Special. Hughenhaal is strangely attractive.

If Disney is posting such losses, its not surprising that they're so nervous about PoP and so determined to promote the Reeking. Poor Jake, maybe signing up to Disney (at least moment in time) really wasn't such a good idea.

We have a saying round here....

If you sup with the devil, use a lang spoon....

(If you eat with the devil, make sure you use a long spoon),

maybe Jake should have listened to a wise Scots woman rather than all those clever, clever HW types.

Funnily enough, in central Scotland, a Jakey is a very common term for a alcoholic down and out... which we tend to have quite alot of.

Wicked said...

***I saw that a Mormon representative from Utah is out to do all he can to stop D.C. from allowing gay couples to marry.***

DC always has people from out of town meddling in its business. Quite a few of the crying people outside yesterday's DC council meeting were from Maryland churches. Utah is a bit of a commute, though.

destiny said...

ROFLMAO. What a great post. I especially love the Hair Gone Wild matchup.

It must be strange Wicked living in a place that is so beholden to the U.S. Congress. But when it comes to gay marriage, opponents from out of state show up everywhere, although I guess in all fairness so do supporters of gay marriage.

destiny said...

Woohoo! The Governor signs, making Maine the fifth state to allow gay marriage.

engaged again said...

From Bauer-Griffin this time~

She caught the bouquet, you know. Jake HAD to ask her.

Ted said...

Dear Ted:
Tobey Maguire is Toothy.
—Jenny, Atlanta

Dear Det. Chinless:
He should be, but he isn't.

pr interns said...

We need something to keep Reese in the news

The softball movie?

Two words face mask

More about the wedding?

We used the wedding shower already, what else do we have?

Hey we could have her catching the bouquet no one will ever know.

Yeah she caught it in Milan.

Wonder who really caught it?

Fifty says Maggie threw it straight at Jake and then told Austin to marry him for real this time.

WOW....and thank you! said...

Today's Post

:) said...

Word. Great post!

Seaweed said...

Kacie, sorry I missed your special day so a big Happy Birthday to you one day late!

Tom, sorry to hear about your back problems and hoping you make a quick recovery. I'm wondering how your boss can justify altering your working schedule or situation without any appeal?

All the best.
S.

Eeee its something said...

Call me crazy but I get visions and feelings about things that come true, its scary and awesome at the same time. Heres a strong one I'm getting with Reeke: That I think something is going to happen, something not pro-Reeke, its something like a small boulder that changes everything. I see 3 rocks sitting on dry dusty dirt, 1 much larger, the other 2 smaller in front of it and slight shadows behind them and a dark path between. There's something crumbling and its going to upset the dirt. Whatever it is, its going the way of nature. It has to.

I know what you mean said...

I get feelings like that too, and I can understand that. Interesting!

destiny said...

Is there a coyote and roadrunner involved?

Florida Tom said...

Way to go Maine. 5 down 45 to go.

Great news!!!!!

:) said...

Call me crazy but I get visions and feelings about things that come true, its scary and awesome at the same time./

Sounds fascinating!

Hopeless romanitc said...

"She caught the bouquet, you know. Jake HAD to ask her."


If I'd just got engaged I hope I'd look happier (even after a mammoth flight) than those two did at LAX. If that's them crazily in love, hate to see what they look like once the honeymoon effect wears off.

Wicked said...

***I'm wondering how your boss can justify altering your working schedule or situation without any appeal?***

Me and Tom have been looking into this all day. Basically, most Americans are at-will employees, which means that they can be fired at the employer's discretion for almost any reason. All the websites I looked at said American workers think they have way more rights than they actually do.

I love this song! Finally got home and got a chance to hear it.

press now said...

I wonder how much longer Jake is going to go before he gets another job. Is there anything that he is up for with real funding and an actual confirmation of a shooting schedule? Maybe if he promises Reese will never come to the set he might have a better chance at a new role.

norwegian girl said...

tom<3, hope everything will turn out good for you!

I really dislike public-jake. such a fame-whore. matching hats and making out like teen-agers. not normal, i think, when you`re that age and have suppousedly been together for about two years. i just don`t like those two`s publicity. not at all!

i saw "batman" for the fourth time last week. loved heath:) he`s just so great there, though i don`t think "ennis" was a weaker role played by him. They were just so different.

i know many people believe heath was just unlucky and died of drugs even though he didn`t use such things regularly.
i`ve never believed that!
i remember "poison is queen" told us about his problems in may 2007.
noone of us knows for sure, we just guess. i think my thoughts like everyone else.
i just think some fans(not here), would see it kind of like a shame if that was really the truth.
it wouldn`t be a shame!
heath would have been a victim anyway! he was a victim, because i don`t believe people use drugs in that way if they don`t have a problem.
i don`t think he commited suiced(though that would have made him a victim as well), i just think he died accidentally, though it came from drug-abuse on a regular basis.
kill me if you want(live in norway...with polar bears!;)i just speculate, and even though he was a star, would a weakness nomatter what, made him climb down a cloud or two, if it was a requirest from the fans?

i just hope not they would ask.
people might see heath as a legend. like some do with marilyn, elivs and so on.
i thin`k that`s fair! -just learn from their mistakes!!!

norwegian girl said...

i just know how it feels like for a familie`s reputation when a death just like similar this comes...
he died 28 years old. he`s name was tommy. he was a nice man, though he was totally different when he was on drugs. when he was nice, he would buy baby-clothes to my brother, when he wasn`t, he would steel back the expensive carpets he gave my grand-mother as a gift.
he lost he`s father at age 15, and got work on a bout and turned to drugs.
he was engaged for a peiod, my father never abonded him, but thei`r older brother did.
when my father was 22, his sister, aged 18,who still lived at home, found him in his bed, killed by an overdose.
we`ll never know if it was accitential or anything in that way.
that doesn`t matter to me, because it was drugs. .and so it was.....anyway.
it`s a weaker person who don`t fit in anywhere. i know my father don`t feel guilt, he`s just sorry....because nobody wants a loved one die alone at that young age, never trully knowing the answeres!

prairiegirl said...

Hi ng! It's so good to see you, girl. How have you been?

You know, Heath's death will forever remain a mystery. Not how he died, but some of the circumstances surrounding it and unanswered questions about the prescriptions and past history of any possible substance abuse. I thought he seemed like the consummate actor, totally serious about his craft and a real student.

Your personal experiences tug at my heart, ng. I know - alcohol & drugs can alter a person like they would've never believed it could. And they are used oftentimes to mask some kind of pain inside. For we all usually have an Achilles heel, some kind of vulnerable area. But for some, it's something that just seems to take over them and has such sad results.

I hurt for this pain that you've seen, ng, I am so sorry. But you point out something very wise. It's not always necessarily the person inside doing it; the substance & the mental pain have taken ahold and that person doesn't realize what they're doing.

prairiegirl said...

Well, time to wind it up. Ah, but it is a desolate land now. Only a few voices floating in the wind...Dust in the wind, all we are is ...no, no, no, no!! lol, that's a different song.

I'm watching my Netflix Bruce Hornsby music video. Man, I love that guy. He is a consummate musician, totally serious about his music and you can just see it comes from well within his soul. He breathes it. And he has beautiful eyes. lol. Not that the eyes have anything to do with it, but...He's tall & he's lanky; I always liked that. I just love to watch his long fingers move all over those piano keys with such fluidity. To be able to play like that and sing to your heart's content. What a dream.

cynic said...

"I wonder how much longer Jake is going to go before he gets another job."

Your guess is as good as mine, and I suspect that CAA is thinking the same thing. I heard that there's an opening on the Supreme Court for a closeted gay man....

Unemployment denied said...

"I wonder how much longer Jake is going to go before he gets another job."

Jake does have a job. He is the official escort for Reese. His job is the follow her around, try to make her look desirable, sexy, hip, fashion savy and young, the happy divorcee that any man would be foolish to leave. On second thought, maybe it would be better if Jake stuck to movies only because he doesn't seem to be doing a good job as only being Reese's official escort.

vanity fair said...

He does have a job, marketing Reese's movies, selling tabloid magazines, lingerie, coffee and restaurant promotions,

prairiegirl said...

Okay, last comment. I just wanted to make a proclamation of sorts. And for it, I'll probably awaken in the morning to find that my blogger name has been torpedo'd with a few darts (heck, maybe even more than a few), but that's alright. Let me turn around & give you my best side - go for it. lol. And no regular here needs to respond or comment on what I'm about to say because this is purely my own deal, and especially is no reflection of any opinions by Wicked & Special. In fact, they are more than generous & gracious in how they speak of & treat their fellow bloghosts. Me, I have no reason to hold back.

It's interesting that ng brought up Heath tonight, someone who isn't mentioned a whole lot on here, not because he's not admired or anything. I reckon a guess why could be because it's a Jake, an Austin, or Jake/Austin blog. But, it's interesting because Heath has been verbally resurrected once again down the street with a vengeance.

And resurrected with a clear intent to be used as some kind of string of garlic bulbs or cross against the Vampire Austin.
I'm not going to speak anything further about the technique or content by which it's done - it speaks for itself and doesn't need any further consideration.

And despite the recent events of the past 30 days which have dealt a much-felt, highly morale damaging, double blow to the majority of this community and despite my sometimes frustrated, spit-flying rants, it's like the Hatfields & McCoys. Yeah, I'll flick the guys on the back of their head plenty of times, but when someone outside the Family does it, it's a different story. So, I'd still like to go on record and profess quite loudly that...

I think Austin was at Maggie & Peter's wedding. I think Austenhaal is still a couple & I would imagine living together whenever they're both in town, that is. I'm not threatened at all by Heath Ledger (I used to crush on the guy big time) and the undeniable eat-me eyes that Jake made at him. I think Austin is talented & quite charismatic in his own right. It's not a contest. No one individual is "any better" than anyone else. We are all loved & beheld equally by the One who created us. There's no why's, what's, how's, when's, or heretofore's. It's just one of the most wonderful, unexplainable mysteries I know of and believe.

Still hanging in there. Still holding out. Still hoping for freedom & happiness for the 2 guys. Still don't need any kind of coming out party, just hoping for the opportunity and inner strength & peace to live life as free individuals. And, no, I can't speak from experience or any kind of firsthand knowledge, so I don't have any idea what it's really like. All that can be done from this midwest spot on the map is to try to imagine the whys and, while I haven't usually liked the path taken, try to remain in their corner.

Don't need anyone to feel like they need to agree with me just to make me feel better. I don't have any problem making these comments stand on their own. Nor do I need to troll elsewhere from here on out to make these comments; today was my last day to do that (I know, I know, Clarity! I know that I said, well, you know....I weakened today, though, lol).

And that about covers it. Nite ya'll and sweet dreams.

prairiegirl said...

Oh, and yes, I'm still searching for that perfect William Fitchner picture for a new avatar. Meanwhile, back at the ranch, yes, those are the famous cherry blossoms in my avatar - taken last month when I went to go see Wicked in beautiful D.C.

Gimme gimme said...

New Jake alone pics at IHJ. Whole Foods parking lot in WeHo. Look at his face, he has more chemistry with a voice on a phone than with whatshermidget. Pic #2, two interesting bulges. Forget the pendant, I'll take what's making the lower one, thank you. :P

Special K said...

a voice

two interesting bulges

whatshermidget

Three of these things belong together
Three of these things are kind of the same
Can you guess which one of these doesn't belong here?
Now it's time to play our game (time to play our game).

Ring a ding ding ; )

the proof is in the pictures said...

He looks 8753 x's more vibrant and confident when he's without Reese. He actually looks *healthier* if that's possible - says a lot. And he really needs to ditch the hats, they do absolutely zero for him (sorry, he and Reese look ridiculous when they're together and both wearing hats).

destiny said...

Very interesting bulges, and I thought Weho was off limits?

Good post PG. I can never tell how many people are bashing Austin and using Heath to do it, but I think a lot of those posts come from one person, based on the writing style. And just a feeling, but I get the sense it comes from a gay man with a lot of internalized homophobia, i.e., Jake is too good to be with someone who is gay, he needs to be associated with someone who was straight and more masculine.

sienna said...

i really enjoyed the post today. i made me laugh, something very few jake-related things do lately. he's definitely lost his shine for me, but i know that - if things were to change - i'd probably be back. watching this recent batch of reeking just really did me in. he looks so unhappy - which, if it were a normal relationship, might mean they're on the rocks - but since it's probably not normal, he can suffer on and on, and so can we.

so i'm not saying much - what is there to say, really? but i did enjoy the post today, and i keep checking back to see if Wicked's Mrs. reported in with her gay vs. religion post for me.

hope ya'll are ok. hugs. s.

m said...

Hi guys. Just doing a quick check in. Loved today' post. Here is something interesting. All of my favorite websites work just fine in Italy, but Eonline comes up completely in Italian, and there is no link for The Awful Truth.

eonline said...

^M, look for the flags at the top of the page and select the US site. You’ll see the awful truth there.

eonline said...

^or the flags are sometimes at the bottom of the page. It depends on the country.

prairiegirl said...

Before this day's post disappears, I have been more than remiss to marvel at this Hughenhaal. That took quite a bit of work to find all these pictures (well, Hugh's, anyway) and match them up like this. It's amazing. It's amazing how similar so many of them are; I can't believe it every time I look at them. And that's a good one of Hugh J in the hair gone wild one. I really like that. I can't figure out why it didn't work for me on Jake. I couldn't stand it on him. But anyway, loved this one. It was excellent work, Special.

prairiegirl said...

I agree, Destiny, I think the posts come from one or maybe a couple individuals. But they're dominating, other-voice squashing comments and not only that, but if something is said that really doesn't please, despite no valid reason to do so, it is deleted. And that is as censoring as DC Forum is, I don't care how you spin it. And while it's not fair to judge an entire site based on a couple of posters, it's hard to get a word in edgewise and also have it be able to be respected without being ridiculed like you're on a playground instead of an adult blog. It's an embarrassment.

It's sad because I used to love & laugh over there like crazy and while I still look alot, sometimes I wonder why because some people think this site can get very negative? Try visiting over there for awhile, at least when there's an Austin bashing going on.

Okay, I'm off. This is my Friday, woo hoooo!

:) said...

Prairiegirl,

shouldn't we be grateful for two non-fangirls blogs? Do you really believe hateful comments shouldn't be deleted?

Wicked said...

Every blog is different and what is okay on one is not going to work for another. Let each blog do things the way they want to.

***I think Austin was at Maggie & Peter's wedding.***

I hope he was not. I think it's awful if he was. To attend the family wedding and then have to stay out of sight while your boyfriend cavorts with his fake girlfriend? Too sad for all participants if true.

flf said...

Equally sad, if there was a family wedding and he couldn't go because his boyfriend's beard was coming and your bf's mother was backing it all the way.

So, why does Austin put up with it?

destiny said...

I think Austin was likely at the wedding, and that he got out of Dodge before the Reeke fest the following day. The fact Reeke didn't show up until after the wedding to me is evidence that Austin was probably there, otherwise we would have gotten it before the wedding.

But I agree, either scenario is sad and pathetic.

I also don't see any way for Jake to come out after all of this, which means Austin can't come out either as long as he's with Jake. The best we can hope for is Jake going back to being "single", but I'm still expecting that engagement and a wedding.