Monday, July 12, 2010

How to hide a broken leg

...or pull off that "very special made for TV Movie relationship"

aka The Grey Goose Guide to Summer in the TV biz

Like airplane trips:

(Preemptive apologies for the tandem tweets)
Tweeting from 30,000 feet. I'm so damn dangerous. And illegal. and extreme. And dangerous.
about 10 hours ago via Twitter for BlackBerry®


I like to break the laws of the airways. I have stolen over 6 airline blankets.
about 10 hours ago via Twitter for BlackBerry®

RT @LordScottykins: @AUS10NICHOLS rebel!! Now it's time to defile the bathroom lol about 10 hours ago via Twitter for BlackBerry®

I am headed to the lavatory to do something questionable
about 10 hours ago via Twitter for BlackBerry®

[Lavatory? In a tweet? And something questionable? sending (ahem)"texts" to the hubs?]

You remember in catch me if you can when @LeoDiCaprio escaped thru the toilet? Not possible. Just tried it. about 10 hours ago via Twitter for BlackBerry®

[First trade talks and now trying to escape through the toilet? Next you will be trying to gnaw your own foot off, watch out or you are going to be in a pet carrier next trip]

@AUS10NICHOLS You steal them. I bring my own. Yet this works. Ain't it funny :) about 9 hours ago via Twitter for BlackBerry® in reply to AUS10NICHOLS

[BYOBlankets are a great way to carry all your recyclables when airline and airports never recycle as much as you]

What do three suitcases, two doggies in crates, one handsome Texan, and a middle seat =? An almost awesome redeye flight back to NC. Almost. about 9 hours ago via Twitter for BlackBerry®

'Almost' because the middle seat is never comfy. But at least the Texan has the middle seat behind me. Shoulder rub in my future tonight! :) about 9 hours ago via Twitter for BlackBerry®

[Part of the cost cutting endeavors at the CW, flying economy, and when flying doing promotions for the show, there are no more free tickets]

The texans got your shoulder rub right here baby about 6 hours ago via Twitter for BlackBerry®

[Does this mean any texan can be substituted for another? Like a McBongo swap out or Karl Rove?]

And why when they are standing next to you, why the hell tweet it? OHHH Right. Keep on book.(on script). And have to do at least 2 more tweets in the tweets for tickets program The CW rolled out.

Difficult climb.Atlanta airport.Residuals of ambien still in blood. Wandering around like stoned antelope. About to be taken down by lion. about 5 hours ago via Twitter for BlackBerry®

[Just a tip. Ambien and tweeting maybe not the best combo. Kristen Chenowith tweeted she was going to adopt a Haitian baby after she took Ambien and watched the earthquake coverage on CNN. What would a Goose give up on Ambien and flying? A little chickadee or two?]

And taken down by a lion? Those darn boys, keep popping up even as animals. Kinda proves that Nature vs. Nurture thing.


You know who tweets in their airplanes seats to the person behind them? 16 years olds. GIRLS. 16 year old girls.

Here's a couple of suggestions:

1.When you're nice people will switch seats with you. And don't tell me that "Texan"(is this going to be the new twitter drinking game?) couldn't charm someone into switching seats and sitting with his "lady"? Mr. Nichols you're losing your game there bud.

By the way, is Texan the new "tiny"? Well .... you can't ever call Austin tiny ... now can you? ; ) But it will get overused even more than tiny ever did.

2.Turn around and talk to them.

All that aside look at their timing and the discrepancies fire off a bunch... and then hour later replies.. his response when off the plane. You are sitting with in 2 feet of each other. And the comment about walking around in the airport was sent before responding about the shoulder rubs, but somehow they appeared in the opposite or on his twitter.


Did think it is forgotten ..... how do you hide a broke leg?

You don't stay in LA.

Back in 2006 when Austin broke his leg during the summer, and it looked more like Austin and Jake were split.(which it did look there was a little bit of a break, but not as long as it appeared) Why would Jake hang out with two guys from Austin, TX that whole summer, and take a couple of trips to Austin? Well if YOUR TEXAN is in Texas, it's great cover.

There really wasn't a good reason for Jake to make two trips to Austin with Lance and Co. that summer, unless his Austin was in Austin.

Later can come back to LA on crutches, shop for DVDs at Tower Records together and go on a date and see Death Cab for Cutie and everyone thinks it was just a bad sprain if they run into you.
And of course not have a photo out there until your off your crutches. Long pants hide that skinny pasty leg you get and can cover the Aircast you have to wear for a few weeks more to boot!

Well played Mr & Mr well played. The all male review works so much better than when female guest stars drop in. Might want to think about going back to that, bet those ratings would climb!

44 comments:

prairiegirl said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
prairiegirl said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
prairiegirl said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
destiny said...

Hey guys, just popping in to say hi. It's been crazy busy, and not just at work, so I haven't had time to catch up on everything, let alone do much commenting.

Stubborn TB said...

Wow, really? Livetweeting your "private" conversations to convince everyone you're a couple even though you only have to turn your head to actually talk in person?

What's next? Trying to convince everybody they have sex by doing a blow-by-blow via twitter?
"Oh yes, @Aus10Nichols, harder!" "Yes, @SophiaBush, touch me right there" "Oh @Aus10Nichols you're fucking me so texan-like cause that's what you are. A Texan. See, I know you so well."

I'm not sure if they even realize anymore that all this releasing of private pictures and holding conversations via twitter instead of face-to-face actually don't make them look like a real couple. On the contrary, it just makes people think that the lady doth protest too much.


And I think the whole business about Austin being Texan is because that's something that Sophia knows about him, so she's using that to show that she knows him oh so well. Notice how she didn't mention a word about Austin being part Dutch until he did? Just wait, one day he's going to mention being born in Michigan and Sophia will suddenly start talking about just loving those Michiganders.


And you're absolutely right Special. They managed to keep Austins injury under wraps for almost 2 years. No need to go to an event and hold an interview talking about having crutches so everyone would know exactly who you were with at any given time.

And to go back to the point I made earlier: When you don't try so damn hard to let everyone know everything about your private life and instead it just gradually comes out by itself, it makes a way better case for your relationship being real.

prairiegirl said...

And as a final showing of my contriteness, I will pledge to stay away and refrain from posting comments. Lest I bring any further shame and humiliation upon the two communities, and most of all to you, WFT2'er.

I may even do a Luke Skywalker's dad and turn to the other side. I'll pledge that Jake is straight. That he & Reese were for real. That Austin is straight. There is no BT. There is no Toothy Tile.

And I love all trolls.

That is the best I can do for you, WFT2'er. I'm drained dry.

Special K said...

What's next? Trying to convince everybody they have sex by doing a blow-by-blow via twitter?
"Oh yes, @Aus10Nichols, harder!" "Yes, @SophiaBush, touch me right there" "Oh @Aus10Nichols you're fucking me so texan-like cause that's what you are. A Texan. See, I know you so well."


Bahahahaha LMAO


The whole tweeting on the plane thing really seems to contrived, and if you are sitting in the middle seat between two people aren't they going to be annoyed if you are using you handheld wireless devices that you are supposed to turn of during the duration of the flight? I can see sneaking one messaged out and not getting anyone's attention but come on.

And if they flew into Atlanta then going on a regional flight to Wilmy they were flying American Airlines.

And tweeting and cell phones are no no's on their planes. Have been and still are. (Big brother commutes weekly on American and has for the past 3 yrs, and even being in their Platinum Club doesn't let you get to do that on their planes.) Sp did they really do it, or did they set it up before hand and sent to twitter on a preset?



PG - just one more thing you must do, wear sack cloth and ashes. Ok, not the ashes, but the sack cloth, well ok not actually sack cloth, but a really uncomfortable outfit. Yeah, an uncomfortable unflattering outfit. : )

get with the times said...

Spesh, I guess you haven't been following the latest advances in air technology - more airlines than not now have wireless service and tweeting/texting/surfing the Internet are all allowed.

Special K said...

but not American yet and that is my point

Jersey Tom said...

PG u are forgiven. I don't care what u did but I forgive you:-)

sophin tweets are so ridiculous. I hope this show is canceled after about three weeks. These two are desperate I know and want to keep their job but I still think they are a couple of phonies and I hatew the homophobic deceit. I do think they are a little bit better than reeke but still phony.

gwtt said...

Oh I see. How do we know it was AA again?

Stubborn TB said...

but not American yet and that is my point

And let's not forget that Austin himself mentiones that his tweeting on the plane is illegal.
Regardless of whether they actually did this ridiculous live-tweeting or not, he wouldn't say that if he had been offered wireless surfing.

Jersey Tom said...

I wonder what Jake thinks about when he thinks about the most unbelievable showmance in history. I guess the best he could say to himself is well I got paid a lot of money. Lying and money go together so well. Congrats Jake.

Special K said...

Even Austin said it was illegal. when he did it, and as of past Friday, American still wasn't letting people. But I can ask big brother if they let him text on regular schedule Monday morning flight, if to see if they had a sudden change of policy over the weekend to accommodate LA to ATL flights.

Special K said...

American is what they have flown in the past from LA, and ATL is one of AA's hub. It also operates a regional service to Wilmington.

gwtt said...

So is Delta, whose main hub is ATL and who has a direct flight from LAX to ATL, direct flight which fits with when Austin was tweeting and when he was on the ground in the airport.

Delta is also "mobile enabled".

Special K said...

GWTT

If it's Delta then why would Austin say it's illegal at 30,000 ft.

gwtt said...

Who knows. Why does he say a lot of the things he says? To appear as a rebel? But the timeframe definitely fits for it being a Delta flight.

Special K said...

Boston Herald Inside Track
Today - July 12


Vintage actor Brian Dennehy grabbing dinner at V.R.’s in Wellfleet . . . Hollywood sibs Maggie and Jake Gyllenhaal shopping and stopping to chat with friend Chris Fischer at the West Tisbury Farmers Market . . . Jake and pal “Smallville” actor Tom Welling, along with boxing legend Sugar Ray Leonard and Black Dog top dog Rob Douglas, yukking it up at Lenny Clarke’s comedy show at David Ryan’s in Edgartown . . .

Inside Track

Jersey Tom said...

I wonder if Jake got invited to Chelsea Clinton"s wedding. The location is being keep very secret. MV would be a nice place for a wedding and I know the Clintons do spend time there in the summer.

wedding bells said...

Rumor's Chelsea is getting married in Rhinebeck NY. Maybe Jake's going.

Special K said...

Interesting timing that after two weeks the Track Girls have tracked Jake down on the island. And it comes out on the day, his hubby is on the move. Hmmmm.

It is really good cover because it finally is official he's there, but maybe that's the cover. Because he isn't there at the moment or soon to be moment, and now is going South, while everyone thinks he's on the island for a while.

Special K said...

Big fire on the Vineyard. Menemsha is a fishing village that is considered part of Chilmark. - SK

TheBostonChannel

BOSTON --
Crews on Martha's Vineyard were battling a fire at the Coast Guard Station Menemsha’s boathouse and pier on Monday.

The fire, which started at approximately 2:42 p.m., fully engulfed the boathouse, pier, a truck and trailer for a 25-foot boat, the Coast Guard said.

The station's 47-foot boat left the pier just before it became engulfed in flames, the Coast Guard said.

The harbormaster ordered boats to evacuate the harbor, the Martha's Vineyard Times reported.

There were no reports of injuries, but all available EMTs were asked to head to the site, as well as all Edgartown and Tisbury fire personnel, the paper reported.

About 22 crewmembers are assigned to the station.

Special K said...

More pictures of the fire and the burned out pier.

More fire pictures

Jersey Tom said...

wedding bells said...
Rumor's Chelsea is getting married in Rhinebeck NY. Maybe Jake's going.



If he is headed south that would be along the way. Maybe Jake will be back in Pittsburgh for the summer and fall. Quick flight to Wilmington.

M and M said...

Difficult climb.Atlanta airport.Residuals of ambien still in blood. Wandering around like stoned antelope. About to be taken down by lion

Awww. You mean Jake wouldn't share his lifetime supply of Dr. Bach's Rescue Remedy with you, Austin? Oh, that's right. Ambien sounds a lot better than both of you sharing the same homeopathic treatments for air travel. Much more manly and Texan-like to self medicate with an hypnotic. Gotcha.

Oh, I know. I bet Sophia's going to soon tweet about her tragic mistake of swallowing an Ambien when she thought it was her birth control pill. Then 9 months later you can post a photo of that beautiful Sophin child on fanpop, along with all the other children in your life. You know, the one's you're actually proud of sharing with the general public. Wouldn't that be a hoot? You know like an owl?

Hmmm. Speaking of creatures of the night. Don't know why, but somehow, I don't think you have a problem being taking down by the right kind of predator. Even if that magnificent, noble creature use to sometimes wear a dorky owl shirt when you went out for a coffee run after a roll in the sack. You got to admit that a quirky, fashion sense is more than adorable on the right kind of lean and tall physique. And, I'm not talking about the kind of Red Carpet preening tailored made for pint-sized doxies, either.

Magical Elixir for Those Who Wish to Take Flight

OMG said...

^^:)

One of my fave songs today. ;)

Habanero said...

And Love Rollercoaster too. ;)

MA Fire Marshall said...

Crews on Martha's Vineyard were battling a fire at the Coast Guard Station Menemsha’s boathouse and pier on Monday.

Shit. Jake and Austin had sex in the boathouse and set off some sparks again. I TOLD them only public sex in fire retardant areas but do they listen? No.

Hester said...

PG - just one more thing you must do, wear sack cloth and ashes.

With a big red "W" embroidered on it.

twitter said...

What's next? Trying to convince everybody they have sex by doing a blow-by-blow via twitter?

@SophiaBush deeper and swirl more

@Aus10Nichols mmmphh

LOL said...

Shit. Jake and Austin had sex in the boathouse and set off some sparks again. I TOLD them only public sex in fire retardant areas but do they listen? No.

LMAO!

destiny said...

Okay, catching up, so you may see multiple posts from me.

First, yesterday's spotlight was wonderful. The courage of that man is just unbelievable. It would also make a great movie.

it was not gay bashing as Lou is not gay and Lou never even saw him coming or he would have been able to at least deflect the blow

This comment from Lou's dad about his son getting bashed makes me sad for a couple of reasons. First, it is just wrong. You don't have to be gay to be a victim of a gay bashing, you just have to be perceived as gay. I haven't seen any news updates as to what happened, but it wouldn't surprise me if if there wasn't homophobia involved. Two, his dad was sure quick to defend his sexuality and his "manhood" with that statement about he could have kicked their asses if he hadn't been surprised. Is there fire behind the smoke? And if not, again it's beside the point.

dt via twitter said...

@SophiaBush dick feel rly good
@SophiaBush sogood
@Aus10Nichols hurry
@SophiaBush rlyrly good
@Aus10Nichols cant breath
@SophiaBush baby u mouth fel good
@SophiaBush so good
@Aus10Nichols choking
@SophiaBush relax
@Aus10Nichols stop
@SophiaBush cant stop
@SophiaBush b dun 1 min
@SophiaBush ur throat fl soo godd
@SophiaBush u feel good?
@SophiaBush feel good 2u?
@SophiaBush ru there
@SophiaBush ru ok?
@SophiaBush y u not moving ??

destiny said...

Austin is a different breed from Jake. I think I have learned more perhaps in the past two weeks about a small corner of his inner character than I have in the past 2 years on this blog. And it's not good.

I can see an engagement being on the agenda, albeit a fake one. Notice Austin is ditching the ring now. I really didn't see an engagement coming for Reeke. But I can with Sophin. They're setting it up. Can't you see it?

Mirroring Brulian, Sophin decides to tie the knot. And then OTH can get the axe and those 2 can call it a day after a grace period.


Agree with all of this PG--except that for a while I was expecting a Reeke engagement.

destiny said...

sophin tweets are so ridiculous. I hope this show is canceled after about three weeks. These two are desperate I know and want to keep their job but I still think they are a couple of phonies and I hatew the homophobic deceit. I do think they are a little bit better than reeke but still phony.

I agree Tom. And you know what would really be sweet revenge, so to speak? If the CW decided to pick up the show Bomer/Quinto and Schwann are pitching to replace OTH.

Hey Tom, glad you enjoyed Howl. I really want to see it, Ginsberg was so interesting, and Howl is probably one of the few poems that I know --and love.

destiny said...

LOL the sex twittering.

PG, you should just ignore wft2, who sounds an awful lot like ECF.

One more thought, that Tom's comment reminded me of. Back to Lou and the bashing. It is impossible anymore for me to hear about a gay bashing and not think of people like Jake, Austin and all the other HW phonies out there bearding and lying. The lack of courage, the harm it does to the gay community.......

destiny said...

You know who tweets in their airplanes seats to the person behind them? 16 years olds. GIRLS. 16 year old girls.

Hit the nail on the head Special.

And I haven't been on any planes that allow texting, and I've been on a number of them in the past year.

Special K said...

Congrats Big Papi for winning the Home Run Derby tonight at the AllStar Game festivities with 32 homers.

m said...

Entertaining comments this evening. I loved the sex twitters.

Relationship by twitter - the latest thing. I wonder how much longer till CSI or some cop show uses twitter to establish a phony alibi as a plot device. Maybe they already have. Austin and Sophia are playing with fire though. The best reason not to lie is that sooner or later you get tripped up.

Special K said...

Austin tweeted this about about an hour ago

Hey #nascar fans. Go to www.speedfactory.tv to watch my brother in laws nascar web series. Its ferpin hilarious. about 1 hour ago via Twitter for BlackBerry®

Rowdy Rowdy Rowdy LOL

Just watch.

m said...

Ted will let us know that Sophia and Austin weren't really having sex. The twitters were fun though.

Ha! said...

Its ferpin hilarious.

You have to admit Austin has a great sense of humor tho - I'll bet he makes someone laugh, a lot. ;)

Aus10Nichols said...

@SophiaBush y u not moving ??

@mary_kate_olsen need advice asap