Thursday, May 2, 2013

It's a Good Spin

He not only read the book,  he went to the premiere

Jake was one of the many celebrities who attended the premiere of The Great Gatsby last night. Jake left the red carpet to the others.

 Because who could compete with Martha Stewart in sequined capri leggings.

But let's imagine Jake doing his best Gatsby look

and mingling with the crowd.

Jake:  If you think the movie is good you should hear the book

Isla Fisher/Sacha Baron Cohen/Leo/Tobey/Martha/Anna Wintour/any random caterer waiter:  Don't you mean read the book?

Jake: No hear the book,  you can use your imagination and make up your own pictures.

Random celebrity/caterer waiter: Why would I want to do that when I can see the movie

Jake:  Well the docile tones of the reading of F Scott Fitzgerald's classic can take all your stress away.

Borak or any caterer waiter: I have a guy to do that!

Jake: But  I could do that for you! 

Martha turning around:  You could?!?  You know Jake, I am looking for someone spend time with to unwind. I have a profile on

Jake: Whoa whoa whoa there Martha.  I meant I read the book.

Martha: Jake dear, we all read the book.

Jake:  No I read the online book.  I am the voice of The Great Gatsby.

Martha: That's nice dear,  now what about us.

Jake: Well I like the way you cook Martha,  and those capris are too much!  But no, I don't see it going anywhere.  

Martha: Because you are said to be seeing a model.  Jake dear we both know ... we all know ... well the secret isn't so secret is it.

Jake: Martha what are you trying to say?

Martha: You need to spin and I need a spin.

Jake: Speaking of Spinning maybe you'd like to take a class. Exercise it's a good thing. And if I bring a friend to class I get a free green juice smoothie.


Know your trolls said...

I'd love to, but you need to clear up that verbal diarrhea first

The New York Post: said...

"Leonardo DiCaprio and Tobey Maguire celebrated the premiere of “The Great Gatsby” in Gatsby-esque fashion at The Darby after the VIP screening at Lincoln Center and the after-party at the Plaza Hotel on Wednesday night. The pair hosted “Gatsby” director Baz Luhrmann, Jay-Z, Maguire’s wife, Jennifer Meyer, Carey Mulligan, Jamie Foxx, Amanda Seyfried, Jake Gyllenhaal, Anja Rubik, Coco Rocha, Lil Jon, Gayle King and Rohan Marley at the West 14th street restaurant. Guests were entertained by a 1920’s-inspired performance by Dandy Wellington and the Darby Band. “It was like New York’s version of the Globes with A-listers everywhere — at one table Leo, Tobey, Jen, Tom Hardy and Baz; another with Jay-Z, Florence Welch and Jake; and another with Jamie, Lil Jon, and Rohan,” said a guest at the uber-exclusive affair. Once Wellington’s performance ended, DJ Sal Morale spun tunes while Voli cocktails were served up. We’re told Welch got excited when her song “Over the Love,” which is featured on the “Gatsby” soundtrack, came on. “She jumped on a banquette and started dancing,” a witness relates. The party then moved to 1OAK, where spies told us Leo, Jay and Jake took over the VIP section of the club until 4 a.m

Jessica Faulkinbury said...

Haha. Love the chat. Very funny. Congrats to RI for passing the new law. Hope everyone has a great weekend.

We have a pitbull pup, who is huge now. He has a new chew toy. My couch. He ripped a big huge hole in it. We were thinking of getting a new but not if it becomes a chew toy. So far he doesn't like his rope toy. Does anyone have a suggestion on what to get him. I need to break him of this. Thanks.

Jersey Tom said...

Sorry Jake. Sorry Austin. Sorry Bradley. Sorry Ryan Reynolds. After seeing Ryan Gosling in his new movie last night there is no doubt that Ryan Goslin is the sexiest man alive. He is also a very good actor..

Methodical Muser said...

Hey, Jessica. You really need large or extra large chew toys for pit bulls (i.e. heavy duty). Something like Nylabones are great for teething. Also, have you ever heard of KONG balls? You can even put peanut butter inside which stimulates them mentally as well. Or, some other kind of treat that they enjoy. The peanut butter helps soothes their gums though. TUFF toys are popular with Pits too. Low cost: a wet, slightly frozen dishrag is good for them as well.